Ditch Desirability. Pursue Purpose

The Greatest Love of All

Many years ago on a beautiful, sunny afternoon in March, I walked into a room on the fourth floor of Hall 6 at the Jomo Kenyatta University of Agriculture and Technology (JKUAT). I was a student there, and so was the man I was about to meet.

But I wasn't meeting him for the first time. He was a classmate. A very cool dude in fact. Very low-profile. Quiet. The most outstanding thing about this guy, noticeable within a few minutes of meeting him, was that he really loved smoking. To this day, he reminds me of Terry O'Reilly's line: "Light them if you got them" in his Age of Persuasion episode about the AMC TV hit show 'Madmen'.

Soon after I sat on one of the beds in the University hostel room, I was offered black coffee and some mandazi. That, given the time and circumstances, was unparalleled 'Ivy League' hospitality!

I had come to this room to get myself some music. Illegally, of course. But it was quite a process, much unlike simply downloading an MP3 track from the Napster website and adding it onto a collection on my personal computer for offline access and - it goes without saying - additional distribution of this bootleg music through endless copying.

Joel gave me a tape cassette. On it was recorded ninety minutes of Whitney Houston music. This included some of my then favorites, and others I hadn't listened to before.

Back in my room, I transferred the music from cassette player to a desktop computer. It was a time consuming exercise, that involved the use of JetAudio, Nero and Winamp audio software. I ended up sleeping past midnight.

Finally, I had the one Whitney Houston Song that carries so much weight, and around which I write this post.




Loving oneself is the greatest love of all.


Utaambia Watu Nini?

Throughout the December 2018 holidays, there was a radio (I neither possess nor watch TV, so I wouldn't know if there was a television version) commercial by the StarTimes terrestrial and satellite TV company. Voiced by one of Kenya's pseudo comedians, the advert ended with the question: "Utaambia watu nini?"
That, of course, is if you didn't get yourself a StarTimes decoder.

That is an interesting persuasion technique, for anybody who knows just how much people love to belong and to not miss out. But there is another way of looking at it - just how much do we say, do or acquire on the strength of what others will say, think or feel?

A key premise of the Advertising classic 'The Mirror Makers' is that advertising doesn't merely show people how or what they are, but what they'd like to be.
And this is also what predisposes people to conmen and frauds - all it takes to manipulate or otherwise unduly influence a person is to tell them a story that resonates with what they either believe or want to hear.

The best example of this is the hope peddling that happens every Sunday...


The Divided Self

In his book 'The Happiness Hypothesis,' Jonathan Haidt writes about "The Divided Self."
In a nutshell, Haidt outlines the various divisions the self has to contend with, given that they often work in cross purposes. These are mind vs body, left vs right, new vs old and controlled vs automatic.

It is for this reason that each one of us, despite the obvious assumption that one would have his or her best interests at heart, will occasionally do irrational and stupid things, fail to control oneself, or do what one knows is not good for him or her.

How should a Person Look Like?

In the United Kingdom, Chidera 'The SlumFlower' Eggerue is a young woman who has had to constantly deal with the pressure to have what is considered perfect boobs.
At one point, she decided she's had enough of this nonsense and launched the #SaggyBoobsMatter hashtag on social media.

Chidera was bold enough to refuse being shamed for how her breasts look.
Sadly, not every person has the support systems around them to come out and speak boldly against harmful societal constructs that dictate what is popular or even acceptable.





It is acceptable and in order that humans will want to belong.
But time and again, we have seen people across all age groups and regions of the world, lower their dignity or otherwise harm themselves in an effort to be accepted by others.

An even more harmful version of this happens on the web, thanks to social networks. It is not uncommon to see people post fake photos depicting their near "perfect" lives in an effort to flaunt glamour and "success" in life.
All this vanity is informed by a misguided craving for social approval and validation by strangers online. Many people feel like they owe their followers and Facebook friends an account of how well they are living their lives.

This is why in August 2018, a popular Kenyan TV presenter was exposed for having projected a very exaggerated and fake lifestyle on Instagram. She would use photos lifted other sites and using filters and digital graphics editing, claim to be doing fashionable things or being in exotic places - all of which was entirely untrue.


The Purpose Driven Life

This book by Rick Warren is a great guide to living a life that is driven by purpose. It is true a lot of it is based on Christian principles. But religion aside, it has wonderful insights that are worth considering.

It much better to pursue one's purpose in life, than to be burdened with an endless search for desirability in the eyes of other faulty humans.
Or even worse - and more damaging - feeling the need to explain oneself to others as if one owes his/her life or happiness to them.

* * *

There is need for every individual to learn how to love oneself unconditionally.
There is honestly nothing wrong with loving who you are, you were born that way. There is no need to hide yourself in regret or feel the need to gain the validation and approval of strangers who in actual fact do not care about you at all. Everybody is beautiful in their own way.

Reflections as I turn A Year Older

 

In today's Weekend Walkabout, we take a closer look at Happiness.
I am turning a year older and it won't be long before I say goodbye to the 30s. It makes sense to look both within and without at the things that either occasion or obstruct happiness, satisfaction and fulfillment in our lives.


That said, let's get right into it.

* * *

Does happiness really come from within or without?

There is a very interesting quote by Hellen Keller that I often come across:

Happiness cannot come from without. It must come from within. It is not what we see and touch or that which others do for us which makes us happy; it is that which we think and feel and do, first for the other fellow and then for ourselves.

The appeal of saying happiness comes from within is overwhelming since it is a statement of personal responsibility and empowerment. This means that should you not feel happy,, you are in a position to do something about it. And by extension, you cannot go around blaming others for your lack of happiness.

In his book The Happiness Hypothesis, Jonathan Haidt dedicates Chapter 5 (The Pursuit of Happiness) to this particular question.
The long-held notion that we cannot seek happiness in external things, or that external conditions don't affect our levels of happiness has since been challenged.

According to Haidt, happiness comes from between.

It is not something you can find, acquire or achieve directly. For happiness to happen, you just have to get the conditions right and then wait. Some of these conditions are within you. Other conditions require relationships to things beyond you. 

Haidt's explanation revolves around purpose and the meaning of life, which emerge once a person gets these conditions right.


* * *

And speaking of levels of happiness, is there a limit to how much one can be happy in this life?
It is funny that despite various attempts at chasing happiness, a majority are likely to spend an entire lifetime oscillating around a seemingly pre-set level of happiness.

By extension, personal income levels have little impact on an average person's happiness. And of course, money will not buy a person happiness.
What this boils down to is that once your basic needs are satisfied, chasing more money, fame, power, sex or beauty will not lead to a happier life.


* * * 

It is true life isn't a simple matter of proclaiming "I won't worry, I'll be happy." But we can at least agree that happiness becomes very elusive when we spend so much time and energy chasing it. It however, follows us when we focus on doing the things that matter and add value in life.
Doing such things makes us happy.

How to Avoid Living like a Signpost

PHOTO | Gerd Altmann (Pixabay)

Depending on how you look at it, a signpost is the epitome of altruism. It shows you the way. It points you in the right direction.

Over the weekend, I read some pages of Ayn Rand's 'The Virtue of Selfishness', where she takes a rather contrarian view of altruism.

Ayn Rand dissects altruism, and the moral questions it lumps together. One is what values are, the other being who should be the beneficiary of values.
The problem with this is the widely accepted notion that any action taken for the benefit of others is good.
On the other hand, a concern with one's self interests (the exact dictionary definition of selfishness) is deemed evil.

There is a loophole in here, if you look closely. But that notwithstanding, today's post is about oneself and why there is a danger in not looking inward as much as we should.

* * *

There is something called Moral Licensing. In my opinion, Malcolm Gladwell, in 'The Lady Vanishes' (S01E01) episode of Revisionist History, gives the most succinct explanation of what this social psychology concept is. He says:

Past good deeds can liberate individuals to engage in behaviors that are immoral, unethical or otherwise problematic, behaviors that they would otherwise avoid for fear of feeling or appearing immoral.

We all see this in action every day in life. Locally, the best example is a politician who does one huge, very public albeit insincere act of benevolence (such as a huge donation at a fundraiser) that gets him elected, then spends an entire 5 year term in office embezzling public funds and engaging in corruption.

This point was further amplified by Evelyn Waithira (Muithirania) during a interview with Kameme TV. She speaks of a man whose work is to announce throughout the village of a 'Baraza' that he himself doesn't care to attend.

I have admittedly often found myself engulfed in this moral licensing phenomenon. Time and again, I find myself doing the very things I have publicly and on record, spoken against on this blog and elsewhere. At times with reckless abandon.
Since I began posting on The Walkabout a decade ago, many are the times I have fallen short of what I write about here, stuff that's meant to offer insight, inspire us and aid in self discovery.

However, all is not lost.


* * *

Many years ago when I was a University student at JKUAT, I used to have regular chats (actual face-to-face conversations) with my pal Doreen. At the time, Kiss 100.3 FM was pretty new and played actual "Fresh Hits."

Now, the only problem with that is just how repetitively any new song was played on Kiss 100. 'Redeemer' by Nicole C. Mullen was a new release at the time, and not an hour would pass without hearing that song play again and again on Kiss.

One hot afternoon, we are walking along the main corridor (it runs from Assembly Hall to Hall 6) and someone in Hall 3 who had obviously made "The Big Switch" was tuned in to Kiss 100 and as expected, 'Redeemer' was blasting away on his stereo. I pointed out how Kiss FM is ruining our listening experience by overplaying such amazing songs.

Doreen's view was different, that such repetitive radio-play wasn't necessarily a bad thing as it gave that particular Gospel track much needed exposure on a secular radio station where it would reach those who wouldn't otherwise tune in to Family FM (a christian station).

We had a small argument over this, and at some point, she asked: "Are you even listening to yourself speaking?"

It is due to this very statement that I've had to, almost a decade later, re-examine myself as I look back to the things I have been posting here, but seldom practise in life.
And it is that moment of clarity that first came my way thanks to Doreen at JKUAT, that insight which has again been brought to my attention by Ayn Rand, Malcolm Gladwell and Evelyn Waithira,  that I have elected to do the needful and walk a different road.



* * *

In the previous post I shared an excerpt from Safe Haven in the Alcoholics Anonymous Big Book [PDF], but omitted the first sentence. It now reads like this:

Now willing to listen and take suggestions, I have found that the process of discovering who I really am, begins with knowing who I really don't want to be.

And best believe me, just as Doreen advised many years ago, learning to actually listen to oneself makes a difference. A BIG one. There is a conversation I need to have with me, and that calls for a moment to myself.

Are you Trapped, Or Constrained?

It's 1st of July today and this being my birthday month, I have decided that now is the time to stop being so selfish...

I am ashamed that I consume a massive amount of information (epic reads, documentaries, podcasts and great TV shows). I, however, give back very little.
Now is the time to write more, as I ought. And I'm starting right here on The Walkabout.

* * *

Back in June, I embarked on a spirited quest to finish reading a number of books that I did start but got distracted along the way (Longform.org happens, you know!). These include 'The Confidence Game' by Maria Konnikova, 'The Andromeda Strain' by Michael Crichton, 'Fooled by Randomness' by Nassim Nicholas Taleb, and two other books that inspired today's post.


* * *

For quite some time now, I have been feeling trapped. Certain aspects of my life haven't gone according to plan and a number of things haven't turned out as expected. Some of these mishaps have been due to character defects or lapses in my judgment. Others still, have been purely inadvertent.
But I am a very firm believer in things getting better. And it is for this reason that almost all my online accounts simply have "In Repair" as my bio.

This quest for escape routes is what informed my decision to read 'Escape Routes' by Johann Christoff Arnold. It is a good book, with the solid truths and included Biblical references a great way to tackle a vexing subject for many who are seeking answers.

On the creative side of my life, the book 'A Beautiful Constraint' got my attention in an episode of 'Under the Influence' with adman and CBC radio host Terry O'Reilly back in 2016. In the Bookmarks episode, Terry talks about tension due to constraints fueling a high degree of creativity.

It is my humble opinion that besides the natural human tendency to postpone things until the last possible moment, constraints, as much as fast approaching deadlines, are at times necessary to "persuade" us to do our absolute best.


* * *

So how does all this add up?

It was while watching the 9th episode of the 1st season of the 911 TV series that I realized what I have for so long overlooked: getting trapped and being constrained are not exactly the same thing.
In fact, it's very easy to mistake one for the other. But it gets all the more easier to differentiate by just looking from the inside out, instead of the all-too-common outside-in perspective.

Here's deep words from the opening scene in the aptly titled 'Trapped' episode:

People are resilient.
I think we're designed that way.
It's embedded in our DNA to forge ahead, soldier on.
It's a whole lot easier to do with an army at your back.
But sometimes it feels like we're on our own.
It might even feel like the world is conspiring against us at times.
A test to see just how much we can take.
How do you get out? How do you break the cycle? 

And now, the closing scene:

A wolf will chew off its own leg just to escape.
Which makes perfect sense.
If you're being held back, cornered, forced into a situation, you do whatever you can to change it, to break free, to survive.
But sometimes escape isn't our default.

Sometimes we stay the course.
We cope, we navigate.
Because traps don't look the same to everybody, especially not from inside one.
Sometimes what the rest of the world sees as having us pinned actually ends up pushing us forward, giving us purpose, control, someone to talk to.
And once in a while, the very thing everyone thinks is holding us back is also what makes us feel at home.

You may want to read the entire 'Trapped' script.


Many are the times we pause and think, even loudly ask, if the next decision will be yet another bad one. And it gets particularly bad when the clouded judgment that is occasioned by entrapment makes you think any additional effort will simply be an exercise in futility - akin to "trying to get your hands clean in dirty water" as Soulsavers put it in 'Revival.'

But there is hope. Should you still feel like you are aimlessly wandering about, blind with your eyes wide open (another Soulsavers reference), you may want to first identify how you're looking at it all.

I'll end with one of my favorite extracts from the Alcoholics Anonymous Big Book: Personal Stories III - Safe Haven [PDF]. This I chanced upon many, many years ago in Prison Break, where Michael Scofield sends an encrypted message contained in the A.A. book, to Sara Tancredi... but this is besides the point. Following is what is important for the purposes of this post:

I have found that the process of discovering who I really am begins with knowing who I really don't want to be... like the power that causes an airplane to become airborne, it only works when the pilot is doing the right things to make it work.

It does help to find out first the very nature of what stands in your way. Certain limitations are actually advantages.

So, are you trapped, or merely constrained?

* * *


All said and done, you wont have to ask "Am I Wrong?" for thinking out the box, trying to reach the things you cannot see and for choosing another way.

Angels and Life's Crossroads

'Angels are dispatched from heaven to inspire people who are at a crossroads in their lives.'

First off, this is a comeback post. I haven't posted on The Walkabout since January 2015.
A lot has happened since that time. There has been so much to write about, and it is my hope that I'll be able to distill all the insight, inspiration and self discovery that has been piling up in my Draft Posts. All in all, I'll endeavor to make regular posts.
That in itself, is a good thing.

Another good thing is that we're having an exciting addition on this journey, on this blog. This person has a more inspiring story to tell than I ever could.
I honestly cannot wait to read my friend's first post, and many more for days and years to come.

* * *

Well, I do have a copy of the Devotional Study Bible, NIV version. I read it every once in a while, unlike years past when I spent time with it every single evening. Not that I no longer read the good book, I still do. I just happen to have a more accessible one - the ever present YouVersion Bible on my Android device.

Isaiah is my favorite book, and this is how it is introduced:

This eloquent prophet lived at a time when the nation of Judah could either regain its footing or begin a dangerous slide downwards. Isaiah was uncompromising, and his "telling it as it is" eventually cost him his life. It is believed that King Manasseh had him fastened between two planks of wood and his body was sawed in half.


Truth be told, we often find ourselves at a crossroads. At times, we feel that we have no choice and have to wade through the murky inevitability that Catch-22 situations bring with them.

And before you say that one always has a choice in any given situation, some choices may be as difficult as a Buridan's ass choice or as limiting as a Hobson's Horse option.
All in all, life is inundated with circumstances that call for external input and much needed assistance.

It is during such situations that you get to meet people. People who are in situations where you can actually help. People who have a genuine need that in your heart of hearts, do realize you can help meet.

You look around and quickly realize that there is indeed a method to the madness that life can at times be. That things indeed happen for a reason. And as Esther came to realize many years ago,

And who knows but that you have come to your royal position for such a time as this?

Earlier in the verse (Esther 4:14) the matter of failing to do the needful is addressed. For Esther, relief and deliverance for the Jews would've come from someplace else but her family would have perished.
Thing is, it is never by accident that you get to meet some people in your life. It is always for a reason.




As always, I am allowed to go back to LOST, which inspired the very first post on The Walkabout.
Here, we meet Jack and Locke expressing varied viewpoints about what possibly brought them all into the mysterious island after Oceanic Flight 815 crashed. It is for a reason and a purpose, says Locke in this video.


All in all, life's happenings are always for a reason. It is upon you to find out how the circumstances you find yourself in, and those with whom you interact, are meant to bring out your purpose and your destiny.
Take time and find out why you're meeting the very people life keeps bringing your way. There is a reason why. And once you find out the reason, be sure to do the needful.

I end with Graham's famous opening lines in the movie Crash:

It's the sense of touch... I think we miss that touch so much, that we crash into each other, just so we can feel something.

PS: This one is for you F.G.N.
Thank you.


* * *


Touched by an Angel was a popular show on KTN Kenya some years back. I rarely watched it, but still purpose to someday get the DVD set and experience all these angels.
Meanwhile, in a song I first heard in 1999 on Family FM, one of these angels, Della Reese, already promises to walk with you...

Beginning with the End in Mind

In the last post, I recounted what largely occupied my mind after spending most of Saturday with my dear friend K. That post about The Fullness of Time did not capture the full extent of our insightful and thought provoking discourse throughout the day.

As is often the practice, I saved the best for last and today, I am pleased to present part 2 of my ruminations.
In a nutshell, this post comprises thoughts on why we wake up every morning, why we even plan or get anything done at all... essentially, the very qualification of hope.

It should be noted that in this post, I'll liberally use some happenings in my own life to illustrate some of the salient points.

Destiny: Purpose or Fate?

When I resigned from formal employment back in December 2005, I was determined to never return to what I invariably refer to as a rat race where consumerism is unnecessarily glorified. I had and still hold the firm belief that there is more to life than just making money and then spending it all. True, there are different strokes for different folk, and I also appreciate that it is "to each his/her own" in most things in life. As such, what has worked for me may not necessarily work for others.

Looking back, I'm proud that I've been and continue to realize my goals first as a freelancer and now as a creative entrepreneur. All thanks to self employment.

The reason I bring this up is that when I quit my job, I knew that my destiny would be shaped by that very decision. I was however keen to do all the needful to ensure that it'd be a function of purpose, and not fate from then on. I've in the past written about destiny, purpose and fate here.

It is in setting up the goals (some lofty) that I perpetually aspire to achieve that I've find my purpose in life. When I began, I knew where I wanted to end up. I am not there yet and often times are in repair, but knowing where I'm headed makes all the difference. Sometimes, it takes a strong will, a stronger won't or simply knowing what you don't want to become.

All Things are Created Twice

At the aforementioned times, I hadn't come across Steven Covey's 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.

For example, my modest den is scheduled for some modifications, comprising enlarging my living room and adding an extra floor. Even before I start sourcing for construction materials, I have already seen the resulting structure in my mind time and again. This is well explained in the 2nd Habit: Beginning with the End in Mind together with the following points:

• All things are created twice. There is a mental (first) creation, and a physical (second) creation. The physical creation follows the mental, just as a building follows a blueprint.
• Begin with the End in Mind means to begin each day, task, or project with a clear vision of your desired direction and destination, and then continue by flexing your proactive muscles to make things happen.
• If your ladder is not leaning against the right wall, every step you take gets you to the wrong place faster.

Hope Doesn't Disappoint

With K, we long agonized in trying to draw the line between blatantly assuming that things will definitely go a certain way in line with our desires, or blindingly hoping even when it is clear that the outcome will most likely be different.

In matters of hope, I never fail to quote the following:

Hope is the bridge that connects you to where you want to go,
Faith assures you that the bridge will hold,
Love gives you a reason to cross it.

Thing is, I see no need to hope for obvious things that are in the process of happening, inasmuch as there's many a slip twixt the cup and the lip.
For me, Hope and Faith often work in concert, as outlined in the Bible:

"Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen."
- Hebrews 11:1 (KJV)

"And hope does not disappoint us..."
- Romans 5:5 (NIV)

To echo Barack Obama's words on hope:

Hope is that thing inside us that insists, despite all evidence to the contrary, that something better awaits us if we have the courage to reach for it, and to work for it, and to fight for it.
Hope is the belief that destiny will not be written for us, but by us, by the men and women who are not content to settle for the world as it is, who have the courage to remake the world as it should be.

In my mind, beginning with the end in mind is what makes one go beyond freshman year in college, graduation with honors being the ultimate goal. It's what makes parents spend huge amounts educating their kids, with no assurance that the kids will not drop out or otherwise not work hard in school.
Beginning with the end in mind is why businesses are started, with the goal of breaking even, returning a profit and ultimately increasing the owner or shareholders' worth. It is what lets an expectant mother love her unborn child, with no way of knowing if the baby will be born at all or even once delivered, end up vexing her a la Kevin.

In sum, life offers no guarantees. There are no assurances that loving people will make them love us back. Only the knowledge that such love is not in vain no matter how it goes is what keeps the love going. By extension, nobody knows what tomorrow holds. The mere hope that the day will be much better if we do something to make it so, is all that matters. After all, of what use would life be if we all knew what is in store for us? Methinks that is the same reason immortality isn't exactly that much appealing.

Not knowing what will happen next is in my mind the best incentive to change things and thereby shape our destiny.

Finally, another photo of the amazingly beautiful place K and I visited as we discussed the above.

Good to Great by Jim Collins

Learn and Share

Late last year, a very inspiring tweep and fellow blogger handed me a copy of Jim Collin's bestseller Good to Great: Why Some Companies Make the Leap... and others Don't.

Owing to commitments and other hitherto scheduled reads, I gave the book to my dad, who has really liked reading it.

I have however started reading the book, and just flipping through the pages, I realize it has wonderful insights that apply both in business and in life.

Good to Great

What Others Say

This post isn't exactly a review of the book. You can read editorial reviews at Amazon.

A quick glance at the first chapter [titled Good is the Enemy of Great]:

Good is the enemy of Great.

And that is one of the key reasons why we have so little that becomes great.

We don't have great schools, principally because we have good schools. We don't have great government, principally because we have good government. Few people attain great lives, in large part because it is just so easy to settle for a good life.

The vast majority of companies never become great, precisely because the vast majority become quite good - and that is their main problem.

Worth Reading?

Yes. This is a book that will remind you that just being good isn't enough, and show you the way to being great.

You then get to do the needful to become great!

Everything Happens for a Reason - Inspired by LOST

"We were brought here for a purpose, for a reason
All of us, each one of us was brought here for a reason
...It may be hard for the others to accept
But everything happens for a reason."
- John Locke (LOST s05e07 - The Life and Death of Jeremy Bentham)

Note:
All this week, posts on The Walkabout focus on life lessons that have been directly inspired by LOST. Read previous LOST-inspired posts here and here.

The Walkabout

On 2nd February 2010, the sixth season of LOST will begin airing. This compelling TV show is my personal favorite, and plays a central role in this blog.
'The Walkabout' was accordingly named after the Lost season 1 episode 4 (Walkabout) in which flashbacks of John Locke's life detailed his plans to go on an original aboriginal walkabout in Australia.

Despite being a paraplegic, Locke was determined to go on his walkabout, and insisted that he could do it, a belief he repeatedly and loudly emphasized with the words:

Don't tell me what I can't do.

Destiny

The word destiny has a dual meaning, one that is either predicated on fate or purpose.

Fate: Destiny may refer to somebody's preordained future, a series of predetermined and inevitable events that happen to somebody.

Purpose: Destiny may also refer to the inner purpose of life that can be discovered and realized.

Those who resign their lives to fate eventually find their destiny. Apparently, things just happen and eventually, they often find themselves in situations they'd rather not be in.

On the other hand, those who actively seek to live their lives by making the most of every opportunity also realize their purpose. They meet their objectives, realize their goals and certainly get to willfully shape their destiny.

Human Nature

Human nature is such that we err, and often fall short of our expectations. In fact, our "great" expectations have a way of selling us short. Usually, the unexpected does change our lives. As espoused in the premiere episode of LOST season 5, the character of people is such that...

...they come, they fight, they destroy, they corrupt
it always ends the same.

The Way Ahead

Despite all this, we do have the free will to change our destiny... for the simple reason that we think, we reason and can make choices.

Perhaps then, we can begin to see that we can challenge ourselves and discover the reason for our being. That done, we can then learn from the past, make the most of the here and now, and consequently face the future with confidence to realize our purpose.

What if we find ourselves being held back by what has happened in the past? What if the consequences of our past actions have already messed a significant part of our lives?

Well, this is a timely question, even as we look back at the resolutions and fleeting promises many of us made early this year but have not yet lived up to.

Thankfully, LOST is not devoid of answers for such questions:

...it only ends once
Anything that happens before that, is progress

Now is the time to move ahead, with the full knowledge that everything happens for a reason. Whatever has happened before is just a part of a bigger whole, of progress. We are in repair - not together, but getting there.

We can therefore go right ahead.

This February, may we exercise our free will and realize our inner purpose of life.